Why is it that when I do something to do something, I end up not actually doing it but doing something else?

I wanted to document my day-to-day life on here but I can never find the words. I like to use words to explain how I feel, yet I no longer know how to feel. I feel independant but alone, happy to be living life, but depressed to do it on my own.

I spend more time online playing games, Counter-Strike, BF2, Pool and hosting on Internet Radio than I do at work.... I don't have a life, I live a life.

No wonder I still alone in solitude....